Step-By-Step: How To Write a Thank-you Note

Receiving a thank-you note for a thoughtful gift or an act of kindness is one of life’s great joys. Writing a thank-you note should not be a chore, but rather the celebration of an emotional connection between you and the recipient.

Before you begin writing there are a few basics to consider:

Write your thank-you note as soon as possible. You don’t want to begin your note with an apology.

Of course, use good stationery. A thank-you note is actually a gift. Wrap your gift in good paper.

Devote enough time and space so you can concentrate without interruptions.

Focus on why you’re writing.

Make your note an emotional experience; look for the emotional connection that is leading you to put pen to paper.

A thank-you note doesn't have to be long. Keep it simple, but keep it sincere.

Starting a thank-you note is easy. Begin with these two words: “Thank you.”

Now just state why you’re saying thank you:

“for the beautiful pair of candlesticks.”

“for the wonderful weekend at the beach house.”

“for your kind note after Dad passed away.”

Your second sentence should establish the personal, emotional connection to the recipient.

“Peter and I just finished a quiet dinner together, illuminated by your thoughtful gift.”

“Although we won’t be able to have a clambake on the shore, we look forward to your visit to the city so we can return your gracious hospitality.”

“I know you never had the chance to meet Dad; you two would have enjoyed each other’s company.”

Now for the closing.

“We promise to use them for only the most special occasions."

“I hope the rest of your summer is filled with sunshine and warm breezes.”

“It’s a great comfort in this difficult time to have such a good friend.”

And that’s it. You and the recipient of your note will be emotionally closer, all because of a little thoughtfulness expressed with pen and paper.

Links:

Letterpress Vines Pearl White Notes

Flowering Branches Pearl White Notes

Engraved Pineapple Ecruwhite Notes

Engraved Peacock Feather Ecruwhite Notes

Find a Crane Stationer

Testament to the Power of the Thank You Note

I wish I had a buck for every time I've written and spoken about the power of the thank you note. I'd be long retired. So rather than write another piece about one of the foundations of civil society, I'll give you a link to an article in today's Washington Post.

This from the owner of a very successful stationery business.

Whether you own a business or not, don't take my word for it, but take note.

Your Thoughts Sought on NY Times Article

So as not to influence your thinking on a New York Times Magazine piece, to be published Sunday, here it is without comment. I would love to have your impressions.

Grazie, merci, obrigado, danke, gracias

Be grateful in many languages.

Thank You

I haven't slowed down in a while to say thank you to those who read, who subscribe, who comment, who agree, who disagree and to all who make this blog thing lots of fun!

and

Tea and Toast and Thank-You Notes

By Mindy Lockard
Etiquette Consultant
Mannerofthemonth.com

The child’s birthday candles have been blown out, the balloons deflated, and the sugar-wired children sent home with their parents. Now with three-quarters of the cake still looming on the counter, it’s easy to want to kick up your feet, pour a glass of wine, and relax. But wait, there’s one more step, perhaps the most important of them all—thank-you notes!

If you love the thank-you process, I applaud you. If you see it as a bit daunting, you are not alone. I admit, after large events the guilt and dread of the impending thank-you process (always the process, never the idea) follow me like Pig Pen’s dust cloud. Don’t get me wrong: I wholeheartedly value writing notes, not just because I teach etiquette but because I truly believe in them. However, when I am not prepared for the process, I don’t necessarily approach it with a joyful spirit. Knowing this about myself, I’ve worked long and hard to establish good thank-you habits for me and my children. I’m happy to report that my children actually like the process and are known to say, “Oh, Mommy, we should write so-and-so a thank-you.” Of course, a little motivation helps: our family policy is that toys and activities can’t come out of their packaging until the thank-you notes have been signed, sealed, and delivered to the mail carrier.

We celebrated Elle’s sixth birthday last week. (I can’t believe she’s six!) Rather than feeling intimidated by the stack of thank-yous we had to write, we made it special with our “tea and toast” tradition. After bathtime and with PJs on we got out the “royalty dishes” (as Elle calls them), popped some bread into the toaster, steeped our favorite tea, and sat down with our social stationery arsenal and a whole lot of patience. (A few thank-yous always fall victim to sticky fingers and dribbled tea, so we plan to have a few extra notes and cloth napkins on hand.)

1. Personalized stationery
2. ManneroftheMonth.com thank-you tracking sheet. We love this sheet because it helps us stay organized and on track throughout the process.
3. Well-organized list of names and addresses
4. Address embosser
5. Stamps


Using our ManneroftheMonth.com tracking system, we discussed every gift over tea and toast:

Who is the gift from?
What gift did they give?
Why are we thankful for it?
How will it be used?

When Elle was younger, I asked the questions and wrote down her response. Now that she writes each note on her own; the responses are a bit shorter since she’s just new to writing. Many times I need to spell out each word: this is where patience comes in.

After each note is finished, we celebrate by checking it off on our tracking sheet. Elle gets such a sense of satisfaction as she checks off each name: who doesn’t love checking items off a list? I certainly do.

Teaching the importance of writing notes takes time and energy. I’ll admit that after entertaining 34 children for a couple of hours, putting the effort into writing notes is not something I desire to do. However, Ty and I believe that the habit of writing thank-you notes and, more importantly, the confidence they instill is one of the best gifts we can give our children.

I’m sure the thank-you for that gift will follow in the years to come!

Free Thank-You Notes: No April Fools!

I really hesitated to put this up today because you might think I'm kidding, but I'm not.

Crane just announced that they will be giving away 10 boxes of thank-you notes in a random drawing each month from among those who subscribe to their e-mail newsletter.



You can sign up here.

Crane Stationery Collections for the New Year

Just about this time every year, I get the first copy of Crane's annual boxed stationery catalog. Just a heads-up: Don't ask me for one; it's a wholesale catalog, which means that the new items displayed will be in stores and online in February.

As we're all looking forward to the New Year, I figured it would be fun to show you some of the cool designs for 2009. We'll start off today with three new collections: Lace, Tea and Safari. All three collections include folded notes, thank-you notes, boxed gift sets and imprintable invitations to create an entire stationery wardrobe.

Lace is presented in Moonstone Grey and Pearl White with delicate hand-engraved stitchery. The Tea set is steeped in jewel tones and teams with scrollwork details crafted in gold foil. Safari features exotic animal prints letterpressed on Crane's naturally neutral shades.

Enjoy.

A Thank-You Note Kind of Day in Small Town America

Today, I'm writing thank-you notes.

Yes, Mom, I'm writing thank-you notes and you didn't have to stand over me.

I'm writing thank-you notes because I'm truly thankful. Not that I'm not thankful when I've been treated to dinner, spent a lovely weekend at a friend's home, or given a necktie for my birthday.

Today I'm writing thank-you notes because I just received the first two donations toward Pownal's Spirit of Sharing holiday program. The wonderful faculty and staff of the Pownal Elementary School, along with a bunch of us in town, are raising money, and recruiting shoppers, wrappers and deliverers for holiday packages for children of families in need.

This year, we're not relying at all on state or federal programs. There are too few of those dollars to go around. Instead, this is a very personal initiative - neighbors helping neighbors.

Long before there were state and federal assistance programs, that's what we did here in Vermont. We helped our neighbors. We understood that a community is composed of all walks of life. That some would inevitably be better off than others.

But we are all neighbors. Nobody cares how much or how little money you make when you're both holding a fire hose; when you're responding to a medical emergency as an EMT; or singing a hymn in church.

That's who we are. That's what we do.

I'm looking forward to writing thank-you notes to my neighbors throughout the holiday season.

Brides Say Thank You on Crane's

A second consecutive shout-out, this time to our friends at Brides Magazine. The September/October (yikes!) issue includes a feature on how to say thank you in response to a range of curcumstances, including: someone gives you money, you don't know the person who gave you the gift, or even if you don't know what the gift is!

It's a great read, and Brides is on the stands now. To illustrate the article, two nifty Crane thank-you notes were selected:

At left is Crane's Black Bursts Thank-You Note, and at right is the Apple Green Preppy Thank-You Note.

Washington Woman Highlights Crane

A big shout-out today to the folks at Washington Woman magazine for a delightful feature in the August issue. Alicia Brewster's "It List" focuses on the hand-written note, saying:

"Whether you are thanking a potential employer for an interview or staying in touch with your old college roommate, a hand-written note is a thoughtful way to deliver your message. In today's electronic-obsessed culture, you can stand out from the crowd with stationery that's sure to strike the right note."

Among her stationery selections are two notes from Crane with D.C. icons:

At left is kate spade's Cherry Blossom Thank-You Note, and at right, nomming on some bamboo shoots, is Crane's lovable Panda Note.

Friday Eye Candy

Whew, it's been a big day. This happens to me every year, the first really nice day here in Pownal, Vermont, and I've got to get everthing done, in addition to the day job.

Let's see, I bought seeds for my plot in the Community Garden. I started raking a spot of lawn. I bought a new lawnmower. I filled up my propane tank. And Sunday will be my first round of golf after a long winter layoff.

Anyway, I'm feeling very springy, and thought I would share with you some springy stationery for this week's Friday Eye Candy.

Enjoy your weekend!




Top row, from left, Spring Garden Thank-You Notes, Engraved Hummingbird Notes and Letterpress Woodcut Floral Wedding Invitations. Bottom row, from left, Wasabi Personalized Calling Card, Adirondack Chair Bar Harbor Notes, and kate spade butterfly place cards.

The Paper Resumé

Since part of my role as Crane’s historian is to tell stories, I figured this would be a good opportunity to tell one of my favorites. And, of course, it has to do with paper.


A few years ago, I was playing in a college alumni golf tournament and it began to rain. I pulled my Crane hat out of the bag to protect what little hair is left on top and my opponent, a director at one of the world’s largest banks, chimed right in: “Peter, let me tell you about Crane paper and my company.”

I was all ears.

He said for some of their best jobs, they get in as many as 5,000 resumés. Here’s how they whittle them down to get to a manageable number:

They gather up a bunch of people around a big table and hand out the resumés. They hold the cover letter up to the light. If the watermark says Crane, it goes in one pile. If it doesn’t, it goes in another pile. They keep the ones with the Crane watermark, and you can guess where the others go. Yup – File 13.

But there are still too many resumés. So, they divvy them up again and hold the cover letter up to the light. If the watermark registers correctly on the page, the resumé goes in one pile. If it doesn’t register correctly, it goes in another pile. Those who got it right are considered for an interview. Those who didn’t, get a form letter.


Here’s their reasoning: “We want to make sure that the most important thing that person did that day was to send us their resumé.”

So what’s the lesson? Actually there are several.

• Paper resumés still matter to many employers.
• The care you take to craft your presentation can give you a competitive advantage.
• The quality of the paper on which you make your presentation can give you a competitive advantage.

There are several Crane papers that are appropriate for resumés and cover letters, and you can find them here:

My favorite – and that’s another story – is Crane’s 32-pound Premium Presentation Paper. The “32 pounds” refers to the paper’s weight or heft. Don’t ask what it really means. It’s arcane paper mill speak. Copy paper is generally 20 pounds. Writing or bond paper is generally 24 pounds. Premium papers are 28 or 32 pounds. Crane’s 32-pound paper is gorgeous to look at and has a distinctive feel in the hand. If you leaf through a stack of papers – resumés perhaps – and encounter a piece of Crane’s 32-pound paper, it makes you stop and take notice. Before your prospective new employer sees your name or your qualifications, you’ve set yourself apart already.

One final thought about setting yourself apart; about differentiating yourself from the competition. Don’t forget to send a handwritten thank-you note after your interview. In this digital age, you might be tempted to send an e-mail. But stop before you hit the “Send” button. Take a few moments to write a short but sincere thank-you note. Those few moments will set you apart. If you don’t get the job, it will be for some reason other than making your best personal presentation.